Graphic by Allen Lee
Alexandra Wallace, a polite American girl, decided to make a video venting about impolite people – specifically, impolite Asians who like to hang out in libraries.
The UCLA student, who was raised correctly by her American parents, vented her frustrations about these Asians, who apparently bother her just a bit – you know, with all their ching-chongs and ting-tongs, and oh, you know, their concern for people who may have been affected by the tsunamis.
How dare they.
All that annoying behavior distracts her from her political science studies, which evidently leads to extreme political incorrectness. On behalf of the Asians in the libraries, we’re very sorry about this.
Watch Alexandra Wallace’s rant below – it’ll make your day.
(A.N. This was sarcasm, by the way.)
Ever wonder who the happiest man in America is? No? Gallup’s figured it out for you anyway.
Gallup came up with this: a tall, Asian American, observant Jew, who is at least 65 and married, has children, lives in Hawaii, runs his own business and earns more than $120,000 a year.
And yes. He exists.
Alvin Wong is a 5-foot-10, 69-year-old, Chinese American Jew, who’s married with children. He runs his own health care management business in Honolulu and earns more than $120,000 a year.
Wong told The Times that he may be the happiest man in America because “my life philosophy is, if you can’t laugh at yourself, life is going to be pretty terrible for you.”
That’s all fine and dandy, but my theory is that he’s the happiest man in America because he’s probably the ONLY PERSON WHO FITS THOSE REQUIREMENTS.
But that could be my bitterness talking, since you know, I’m short, Christian, 20-something, unmarried female who lives in California and I earn a meager salary (cough, cough). But hey, at least I’m Asian American.
I’ve never actually watched a full episode of Dancing with the Stars, but I just might try tuning into the 12th season of DWTS. ABC recently announced this season’s cast “stars,” and it looks like fans will be able to see Hines Ward doing his thing and struttin’ his stuff – off the field.
Ward joins fellow athletes Sugar Ray Leonard, boxing legend, and Chris Jericho, pro wrestler, as well as actresses Kirstie Alley and Chelsea Kane, actors Romeo and Ralph Macchio, model Petra Nemcova, reality star/Playboy bunny Kendra Wilkinson and talk show host Wendy Williams. The show will premiere on Monday, March 21st.
As far as I know, Ward, currently wide receiver for the Pittsburgh Steelers, isn’t known for his dancing skills, but I suppose if he can catch a football, he can catch his partner in mid-leap…
Loyalty. Duty. Respect. Honor. Integrity.
Those five words, grouped together, almost immediately trigger thoughts of the U.S. Armed Forces and the principles they espouse. So when retired Army Captain Brian Chung founded his entertainment military consulting company, he included those words in his business plan’s core philosophy.
“The way we run this business, we take the exact same mentality of [being a solider],” said the 29-year-old chief executive officer of the Los Angeles-based Musa Entertainment Military Consulting. “I think, [that’s] one of the things that makes our business unique.”
It’s not the only thing.
At barely a year old, Musa, which means “warrior” in Korean, stands in a class of its own, providing a service that until very recently no one else has: making sure the entertainment industry gets the military right. Not just technical advisors, the consultants at Musa help film, television, gaming and advertising productions acquire military props and equipment, and advise them on how to achieve authentic portrayals of the Armed Forces.
For those who care whether an Army captain’s colors go on the right or left, or what kind of weapon a soldier should be using in a modern combat situation (and the military folks do care), they turn to Musa. The company boasts a broad network of technical experts in just about every branch of the military and every major specialty, including Navy SEALs and Special Forces. Chung’s past clients (including those he worked with while still with U.S. Army entertainment office) include the feature films Dear John (2010), G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra (2009), television shows and Hawaii Five-0, and the video game Medal of Honor (2010). The consultants are currently working on the upcoming Lifetime series, Coming Home.
“No one offers what we offer in terms of the spectrum of services we can provide a production,” said retired Lt. Col. Greg Bishop, Musa’s chief marketing officer. “Literally, from idea to script development, all the way to marketing the final project, we can help at every stage of the process and can save [clients] a lot of money.”’
By now, you’ve probably heard about Thick Dumpling Skin, the new community website focused on Asian Americans, eating disorders and body image. The website curates stories not only from notable guest contributors, but publishes stories from anyone and everyone – finally giving those in the Asian American community struggling with this ofttimes silent disease, a voice.
I’ll be honest – I’ve never been called fat, except perhaps by my loving family, in the way they might pinch a baby’s cheeks and say “awwww, so chubbbbbyy!” But since I’m so petite (height, not weight), I’ve always been concerned about my weight – when you’re as small as I am, every pound seems to be magnified, and that “last 10 pounds?” Looks like 20 on me.
I’m still lumped in the category of “tiny Asian girls” (the office’s nickname for me is ‘Little’), but I definitely have felt the pressure of having to actually deliver and be one of those 80 lb., stick-thin girls – especially since, let’s be real, there are a lot of them out there. I’m just not one of them, and I don’t have the metabolism or the willpower to be one.
So it’s wonderful to read Thick Dumpling Skin and realize that, while the problem is persistent and sad, at least there’s a place to go to realize you’re not alone. It’s even more meaningful considering that the co-founders of the site, award-winning actress Lynn Chen and Hyphen magazine’s publisher Lisa Lee, launched the site this February by sharing their own struggles with weight.
The wonderful Lynn Chen spoke to KoreAm about how she linked up with Lisa Lee, her current relationship with food and what she hopes Thick Dumpling Skin will do for the community.
How did you come up with the name “Thick Dumpling Skin and the tag line “it’s what’s on the inside that counts”?
We wanted something that was specifically Asian, and had to do with food. I started thinking about dumplings, their ingredients, and *poof* the concept of having “a thick skin” presented itself. Once we had the name, it was very easy to come up with all sorts of puns – like our tag line!!!